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Bryan Benwitz: "Fear the Beard"

1st Following in the proud tradition of great bearded sportsmen like Brian Wilson and James Harden, Bryan Benwitz used the power contained within his facial hair to go 3-1 +325 and seize first place. It was no coincidence that in his first game, matched up against a beardless Susan, that he came out on top, 454-327. Nor was it pure chance that, when faced with Thomas' inferior goatee, he was victorious again, 437-337, aided by a bingo-bango-bongo of ADVECTS, NUTTERS, and PALINODE. The pattern continued in the third game, where Charles' five o'clock shadow was overcome by Bryan, 454-348. Bryan's opener of HISTORY (not to be confused with HERSTORY) was, sadly, not extended to PREHISTORY, though both combatants had the opportunity. A chance for an undefeated night was foiled by Gail, 404-412, proving that playing with the spirit of the beard, as Gail did, is sometimes just as good as possessing the genuine article.

2nd Charles Reinke encountered a "murderer's row" of opponents and managed to cobble together a 3-1 +205 record, a result befitting the club's win-percentage and average score leader. A normally explosive matchup between him and Aaron ended in Charles' favor, 394-297, with only two bingos being played, UDOMETER (n. a rain gauge) and KAOLINES. The bingo count was more impressive in his next contest against Andy, with Charles playing 4 to Andy's 2 in a 467-376 win. As mentioned above, his game with Bryan did not end well for him, but he made up for it by defeating his doppelgänger Thomas in the final game, 482-358. His play of SQUIRREL in that game would win a hypothetical "cutest word of the week" prize, unless you think CANINES are cuter.

3rd Gail Salm calmly won her final 3 games to come in 3rd place, 3-1 +140. Her night got off to a bad (although how could any night be bad when it's spent playing Scrabble? Am I right?) start, with her losing to Sue 343-366 despite a nice find of UNTONED (adj. lacking muscular definition). Things picked up for her starting in the second game, a 428-340 win over Helen, a win that featured the double-Y word-of-the-week-winning ENTRYWAY. An impressive play for someone who, and I quote, "normally hates Y's!". In the third game of the night, victory was earned against Barb, 420-353, with her ENSUITE and TENNERS (n. a ten dollar bill, FIVER is also good) besting Barb's ROADIES (new anagram RADIOES). As previously stated, she managed to squeak by the then-undefeated Bryan, her play of SPINDLER (n. one who spindles, how helpful) drawing a challenge in a deciding moment of the game.

A bunch of new words were played this week: STINGES (Charles), UNTONED (Gail), ENSUITE (Gail), DUDETTES (Thomas), TOUPIES (Thomas).

A Lifetime of Word-Accumulation Culminates in 4-0 Night for Thomas Reinke

1st Thomas Reinke went 4-0 +613 using (roughly) the entirety of his acquired vocabulary, thus finishing a process started so many years ago when he uttered his first word, "geese". His first game against Andy ended narrowly in his favor, 471-371. We say "narrowly" because Andy had a chance to win at the end using the non-obvious hook for AECIA, AECIAL (adj. pertaining to aecia, duh). Thomas' second game, against Joe, was, despite only a 2-1 bingo advantage, a landslide victory, 539-254. Bingo counts can be misleading, especially when one can play SPAZ for 100+ points. For his next act, Thomas defeated longtime foe Charles, 475-382, playing SCIENCES, SHORTIE, and PARLEYS. Charles had the nice play of RINGETTE (n. a type of ice hockey for girls), another one of those Canadian-isms that got added in the latest dictionary update, but it was not enough to stop his brother's dominance. Perhaps Thomas' greatest achievement of the night was holding the bingo-prone Peter bingoless in his final win, 437-302. Timely finds of ISOLATE and ABIOSIS (n. absence of life) kept the board too closed for Peter to do his usual damange.

2nd Bryan Benwitz made the best out of an opening loss to go 3-1 +411, finding that sometimes getting put in the "loser's bracket" after the first round isn't so bad after all. His first game against Susan resulted in a 333-415 loss, with his TEARGAS no match for Susan's UNITERS and YONDERS (n. the far distance, but I don't see how it can be pluralizable?). He overcame this defeat to win his next two by almost 400 combined points, 495-279 against Mary and 439-265 against David. In his win against Mary, he played the high-scoring QUERIST (n. one who queries) for 94 points. He followed up these impressive wins with a third impressive win, this time against Charles, 485-382, aided by his acceptable-to-everybody-except-the-dictionary play of OFFROAD*. If the club starts a letter-writing campaign right now, I'm sure we can get it added to the next dictionary update.

3rd Peter Schmiedicke came in third, winning his first three and going 3-1 +132. A close win in the first round against Lynda, 415-388, was marked by his creative plays of BITMAPS (n. an array of binary data) and BONELESS (n. the kind of wing you get when you don't want to deal with bones). His second game was notable in that he bingoed with the dreaded "L-N" combo, playing the high-probability LORINER (n. a maker of implements for saddles and harnesses, also LORIMER) against Buffy. This gave way to a big 472-306 against Helen, exacting sweet, sweet revenge upon the player who had beaten him 4 times in a row prior. Peter will deny that revenge is what he sought, but we all saw the smile on his face after he won. A chance to go 4-0 and receive the highest honor of the night, the "first paragraph", was sadly stymied by Thomas, as detailed above.

Three new words (now over a year old!) were played this week: two by Charles, RINGETTE and SHEITEL, and one by Susan, YONDERS. Phony of the week goes to Dave, who played RESEXED. I can think of some funny definitions, but this is a family-friendly blog. He was probably thinking of DESEXED (v. to spay or neuter).

We welcomed three new players tonight, Paula, Basu, and Nancy. We hope that they had a good time; at the very least they all left with the nectary taste of Scrabble victory.

Andy Bohnsack Successfully Executes Plan to Score More Points than Opponents

1st Andy Bohnsack brutally trampled the winning aspirations of all four of his opponents to catapult himself solely in first place, 4-0 +305. A 390-353 victory against Charles Reinke (bingos: SOCAGER and UVEITIS) started things off well, and they only got better from there. Fast forward to the end of the fourth game, only to find that Andy had pulled off the coveted Anti-Reinke by knocking down Thomas Reinke by a score of 449-382, again with two bingos: AIGLETS and GORDITA. In between those two wins, Andy also felled Joe Horowitz, 450-337. However, that win was befouled by the shameful stench of a phony bingo, CHAIRER (CHARIER is perfectly acceptable and stenchless). Andy also played BEPAINTS and FINALES in that game, while Joe was limited to one bingo of RADIANS.

2nd Aaron Bader, coerced into playing a fourth game by dictatorial club directors, overcame his tiredness to finish 3-1 +165. Like Andy, Aaron opened the action with a solid win against strong opposition, upending Bryan Benwitz 436-353 despite being outbingoed 2-1: Bryan played THRONES and STEARIN, but Aaron's 93-point WEBSTER (n. an archaic term for a weaver) was enough to seal the deal. Aaron overcame more adversity in a 418-386 win against Charles Reinke, as Charles got down an early 149-point 3x3 of FLINGERS (the loss thus soothed by the healing salve of a five-dollar prize). Aaron's MERITING and OUTPLAYS turned out to be self-describing as Aaron fought out the win. Not all adversity is meant to be overcome, however, and Aaron was taught that lesson by Joe Horowitz in the form of a 431-379 defeat.

3rd Helen Flores crushed her yearly average by scoring 404 points per game as she finished in third place at 3-1 +37. After defeating one Reinke the previous week, she defeated the other Reinke this week, triumphing over Thomas 469-398. Thomas played LACTEAN, CYANOGEN, and ENABLERS, but Helen got down TOOTSIE as well as a punishing late-game REMIXERS for 126 points to secure victory for her own. Her 412-371 victory against Gail Salm was a little more subdued, but still a quality win, as Helen got down two more bingos, QUAKERS and DEVICES. The one blemish on her scorecard was delivered courtesy of Mr. 4-0 Andy Bohnsack, who won by a final of 466-378. Helen's ETESIAN and AITCHES did much in the way of damage prevention, but were unfortunately not quite enough to snag the win.

Aaron's SCROFULA, a type of tuberculosis, was awarded word-of-the-week honors. Both new bingos this week were played by Thomas: ARTSIES and SHITTER.